Ten Minutes of My Life

Ok. This has not been the greatest week, but I have high hopes for next week. So in an attempt to see the humor in some of the chaos, I give you the true story of ten minutes of my life last night. Or less, I'm not sure - I wasn't checking the clock. :)

It all started with Mama needing a bathroom break. Because even mothers have to go sometimes. I typically take Alex with me - between the dog and the older brother, it's just safest that way. So just before I got my pants fastened, Alex lost his balance. He managed to fall directly on his face - no hands - from a sitting position. I'm not sure how he did this, but apparently he's inherited my innate grace. When he landed on his face, he cried. Of course. I would, too. He also bled from the inside of his top lip. (Ok, there really isn't any humor at all in that. It was rather upsetting to both of us.)

So he's crying, I'm trying to calm him and simultaneously see where the blood is coming from and fasten my pants. Because it would seriously offend Ethan's sense of propriety if my jeans would end up around my ankles. So I get everything properly fastened, and Alex is nearly hysterical.

By now, Ethan is standing next to me asking what's wrong, why is he crying, is he hurt, etc. I manage to very calmly tell him to go get his pj's on, get Alex to stop crying long enough to wipe the blood out of his mouth, and start to nurse him.

About that time, Yellow starts dancing around and whining. Obviously he has to go outside. Normally, I would just ask Luke to take him out, but he was already in bed because of a blinding headache and ringing in his ears. (His not-feeling-well on Monday ended up being a sinus infection.) So I hope that Yellow will make it until I'm done feeding Alex - he doesn't take long to eat, at least.

Meanwhile Ethan has his jammies on and has gotten himself some juice out of the fridge. Almost immediately, I hear, "Ooooh, nooooo!" I ask what's wrong.

"I've spilled my juice. And it's on my pajamas. AND IT'S GOING TO STAAAIIIN!"

Because staining his clothes is the haunting specter of his six-year-old life. Like most six-year-olds, of course.

I tell him to take a napkin and dry it off the best he can, and I'll deal with it when I'm done feeding Alex. And taking Yellow outside.

I get Alex tucked snugly into bed and told Ethan to go change his pajamas while I take Yellow out. I come back in and look at his pajama top. His red pajama top, that you cannot even see the grape juice on. I try to find a wet spot, and I'm not finding anything.

About then Ethan comes out in his clean pj's, so I asked him where the wet spot was.

"On the back."

"On the back? How did you get juice on the back of your shirt?"

"Well, I was wearing it backwards."

Oh. Obviously.

Thankfully, things calmed down pretty quickly after that. So here's hoping next week is much better than this week!